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The Fasting Focused Lifestyle Blog 

Greetings friend. 

Thanks for checking out my blog. This is the space where you will be able to keep tabs on whats new in my world, as well as constant sources of inspiration, reflection, and motivation for you to use on your fasting journey.

 

Remember, I believe in you, even if you dont!

November is a hard month for me to go through now as a widow.


On November 8th, 2019 our wedding anniversary, initially a day of love and celebration, turned into a completely traumatic day when I was told my husband was dying and would be going into hospice.


November 10th was the day my husband passed away.


hospital, widowhood, grief, loss
My close friend captured this photo, the last picture of the two of us.


This day started as a loving, hopeful reminder of the wedded bliss we shared, only to end in debilitating fear, pain, and trauma sensations all over my body that are still felt today.


(L-R) My sisters, Jim, our kids, me, my Dad, and my mother's parents


Being told that my love, my best friend, and father to my beautiful babies was dying, was life-shattering. It felt like my world was crumbling all around me.


I remember dropping to the floor (just like you see in the movies) when the doctor told me his prognosis.

I remember not being able to hear anything besides a static hum through my body because of the total shock that took over me.

I remember having to console and tearfully explain to my children why Dad wasn't going to come home from the hospital this time.

I remember sobbing and hyperventilating to my parents on the phone in New Hampshire.

I remember endless waves of close friends coming to visit and giving tearful hugs to us both.


I vividly remember every one of those life-shattering moments like it was yesterday, even now, 4 years later.


Through every emotionally challenging moment in those days, I found I was able to stay strong and resilient with fasting. This deliberate choice was not out of a fierce weight loss goal or vanity whatsoever, it was a fierce will and determination to live, despite my growing grief.


I had a conversation with my husband Jim before he became unresponsive. He wanted me to know he was so proud of me, and then he made me promise him that I wouldn't go backward. It was like he knew that I still had a deep little flicker of danger inside me that was ready to emerge out of this situation. (He was referring to the traumatic demise of my Nana the year before, and how she succumbed to grief willingly after my Papa passed away 10 months prior.) I promised him I would stay as healthy as possible for our little family, and I didn't take this promise lightly.


Family and friends around us at the time didn't understand (or want to understand) why I was choosing to have only water while everyone else was sharing seemingly endless amounts of food. Many of them insisted many times that I should stop fasting, and "just eat something."


While many of you could probably understand that level of grief doesn't really allow for much of an appetite, I also felt a deep internal switch flip which communicated to me the importance of leaning into fasting to stabilize my headspace and emotions.

I knew that allowing grief to fuel my eating behavior, even a little bit, was potentially catastrophic for the progress I had made and the future I could envision.


That deliberate choice to fast in the face of trauma and grief, despite what most may believe, was an incredible source of strength, while demonstrating love, compassion, and incredible self-awareness of my emotions.


Leaning into fasting was what I knew and felt confident would keep me present, stable, and aligned with my long-term goals, which were staying alive and healthy.


Fasting was my lifeboat, and I continue utilizing this tool when approaching potentially challenging moments where my headspace could waiver into negative thinking.

Again, I don't share any of this to boast or brag, I share because my default setting for my entire life had been a "victim" mentality which then drove me to overeat to pacify those feelings. I have since realized that it was a direct effect of my feelings from people and environments I was in for my entire life before fasting.


My experience with the many losses I've had, and being hurled into widowhood absolutely changed my life, but this is now a part of my life that no longer consistently keeps me in that negative headspace.


Focusing on the worst and most negative parts of our lives is the easy route. It seems contradictory but how often do you have moments of gratitude and appreciation each day for your life? I bet it can be hard at times to find things to be happy and thankful for when you are feeling your worst.


Very early into widowhood, I had a slow (but significant) mindset flip that allowed me to see the many things in my life worth expressing gratitude for. I allowed myself to passionately focus on the people and things in my life that filled my metaphorical cup.


Does that mean I no longer have a negative headspace?

No, but now I am able to quickly identify when it comes, and NOT hold onto those feelings.


I have come to understand that emotions are like tunnels we travel through, and we are constantly in motion every day. Acknowledge the emotion without staying and holding onto it. Every emotion can and should teach you something and also provide insight into a deeper need that may not be getting properly met.

We all have (or will have) incredibly challenging moments in our (seemingly short) lives. To me, fasting is a tremendous help in letting me reevaluate what is worth caring about, in every moment of every day.


Living our lives (even after traumatic loss) can be extremely challenging, and this is where, I feel, there is tremendous opportunity for growth. I imagine it akin to a Roman Colosseum where the warriors would be thrown into battling for their life. While this can feel like the odds are stacked against you, this is where you can take opportunities to learn and get to know what you are battling, express gratitude for the opportunity, and overcome it. This is where your strength and tenacity for this lifestyle grows.


This is how (and why) I fast in November.


Each year since becoming a widow, I have grown and gotten so much emotional strength from leaning into an extended fast for the first 10 days of November.


This year I plan on doing it again.


Again, my reason for this extended fast is NOT for dedicated weight loss (and again I would NOT recommend others to do this without being metabolically fat-adapted yet).


The reminder of this season still does hit me hard emotionally, but while the severity of those painful emotions has been decreasing over the years, I consider this my yearly "housecleaning" to keep myself as emotionally stable as possible.



 

Are you at a point where you feel ready to embark on a longer extended fast?


If so, I invite you to join me, starting on the 1st of November, for a 10-day extended fast, where I will be hosting video meetings daily, answering questions, giving support, and providing an opportunity for you to connect with fellow fasters! (and more, see details below!)



I am excited to share this experience with you all, and my hope is that you get as much benefit from this experience as I always do. 💛




Are you in need of more intensive support?


My digital handbook is still available on my Etsy store: NOW ON SALE FOR SUBSCRIBERS!


I am in the final publishing stages of my handbook, stay tuned if you're interested in the printed version!


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Yes!

Bi-weekly meetings are BACK, and I'm SO EXCITED! 😆

Some folks may recall participating in these meetings in the past, but I have now finally revised and increased the availability and frequency of these group support meetings!


  • Starting 10/15/23: Meetings will be held on Sundays (bi-weekly) at 2:00 p.m. EST.

  • If you are in a different time zone, no worries, your correct time will display when you're booking your spot!

  • There is a 30-person cap for each meeting, so if your preferred date(s) are full, you can join the waitlist or try another date.

  • Meetings will be held on Google Meet, so be sure to have your mic and video properly working before the session.


COSTS:

A-La-Carte Sessions: 15 USD / session

Bundle: 6 Sessions: 45 USD (originally 90 USD, 50% savings!)




If you've wanted to get supported by and connected with more fasting friends from around the country (and the world), this is for you!


When booking your spot, be sure to add a topic or question you would like to cover in that meeting. There is no judgment, and you are welcome to be as vocal and present or as silent and observing as you'd like.


Think of these meetings like a virtual supportive hangout, led by ME! :)


My goal with these meetings is to allow you, wherever you are, to increase your community and sense of confidence on your journey. While singular support from me is exceptionally beneficial, there is also tremendous value and meaning in connecting with like-minded individuals who are on a similar journey of their own.


You could find your new fasting BFF! 😉


I look forward to seeing you soon!




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This is one of the most asked questions I get (after "How do I get started"), but the answer may not be what you're expecting to hear.


No matter where you are on your fasting journey, this question about motivation can apply to you and your situation.


To this question, I am going to answer with another question back to you.


What is your reason for wanting to utilize a fasting lifestyle?


If your answer is something like, "I want to be healthy and lose weight," I again am going to ask you, why?


As I have mentioned before, this journey with fasting is a marathon, NOT a sprint! This lifestyle will be the most successful endeavor in your health and wellness when you let yourself challenge and refute all you previously have known about traditionally losing weight.


But it goes deeper than that.


What are your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs when it comes to "losing weight?"


If you were like me, your mind may immediately recall marketing slogans, ads for products, fitness influencers, restrictive lifestyles, and risky elective surgeries.


The global weight loss industry value currently, is more than 175 billion as of 2022, yet 13% of adults in the world are obese. 39% of adults in the world are overweight. One-in-five children and adolescents, globally, are overweight. (Ritchie, Moser, 2017)


Yet, the startling reality of this data doesn't seem to surprise us or motivate us that much. The truth is, most of us do not feel truly compelled to take action to improve our health until we are faced with a harsh realization or frightening diagnosis of our own.


Why?


I personally feel that the culture that we live in fosters conveniences, quick fixes, and instant gratification in almost every aspect of our lives, especially our health. This way of life essentially detaches us from the belief, understanding, and application of this natural method of homeostatic balance that is within each and every one of us already:


Fasting.


It's not sexy, flashy, glamorous, gimmicky, or something that can be packaged and sold to you. And that's why it's often met with lots of negative societal stigmas, rules, and restrictions from the global diet culture industry.


While there are many folks, and professionals who advocate for fasting, the lifestyle is still very often paired with unnecessary rigid rules or parameters in order to be successful. I personally feel this takes away from the beautiful, simple, and instinctual effectiveness of this process, and overcomplicates it significantly.


When I started fasting, I had full intentions, right from the start, that this was going to be my story, my journey, my healing, on MY terms!


I had no desire to buy into any company, product, or fad. I had the realization that my prior actions, lifestyle, behavior, mindset, etc., had brought me to where I was. I acknowledged very early on that I needed to take responsibility for what led me here, and nothing I could buy was going to "fix me."


I had to fix myself.


This is where I knew I had to dig deep into my past, but many of you are still a little apprehensive or unable to dig deep to bring light, attention, and love to those inner broken parts of us that continue to negatively affect our best efforts and intentions when on a health improvement journey. This is where you need to stop and give yourself grace, compassion, and lots of love and forgiveness.


We are a product of our environment. So while we can't control the constant barrage of ads, fads, and gimmicks thrown at us, we CAN control the thoughts, feelings, and beliefs we hold towards improving our health for us personally.


Unsubscribe, unfollow, limit, or remove those factors in your environment that negatively affect your unmotivated headspace. Think of your "future self" and how proud you will feel when you're able to clear out, recalibrate, and, refine your environment bit by bit to where your lifestyle fosters healthy living and healing from within!


This journey can be truly transformational, not just physically, but mentally, emotionally, and spiritually as well.


I know you can do this, but you don't need to do this alone! I am ready to help!

I Believe In You, Even If You Don't!


If you are needing support, I am only running my subscriber promotion for the rest of this month:


And for those who need support, but don't quite need the full consultation services, I am still running a subscriber promotional sale on my handbook: "The Fasting Focused Lifestyle Official Handbook" Sale: (Originally $34.95) now only $19.95 (*must be a subscriber to my email list to get promotional code!)


Big virtual hugs to you! You got this!










References:

  1. https://www.expertmarketresearch.com/reports/weight-loss-and-weight-management-diet-market

  2. Hannah Ritchie and Max Roser (2017) - "Obesity". Published online at OurWorldInData.org. Retrieved from: 'https://ourworldindata.org/obesity' [Online Resource] https://ourworldindata.org/obesity#:~:text=13%25%20of%20adults%20in%20the,of%20energy%20intake%20and%20expenditure.

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